I think everyone in the country is sick of this. The smears, the stump speeches, the non-issue news, the hype. A country can only take so much of it. But what is going to be news when the dust settles? How am I going to sleep like a baby without the insistent whispers of fear and hope on perpetual loop playing on my radio, internet, TV, coffee shops, newspaper... wait no one reads newspapers. If I were in ancient Greece or living in a plasma cocoon being harvested for robots while my brain was plugged into a virtual simulation of the 90's with my friend Keanu Reeves, I'd go see the Oracle. In fact, I did visit her and here are some headlines she told me I could expect, after the pic:
"Pumpkin claims 'trick-or-treaters' carved backwards 'B' into face after noticing McCain/Palin sign in yard" - Drudge Report, 11/1/2008"California Prop. 8 gets a 'NO' - Lohan sets wedding date" - LA Times, 11/5/2008
"We have a black president!?!" - Chris Rock, 11/6/2008
"We have a black president?!?" - John McCain 11/5/2008
"Rogue Chicken Terrorizes Supermarket" - Tucson Arizona Daily Star, 11/9/2008
"Remember Rev. Jeremiah Wright and Obama's connection to radical Islam?" - FOXnews, 6/24/2010
"Studio closes deal for Palin afternoon talk show 'Palling with Palin'" - Variety 12/10/2008
"Comedian suicide rate increases over lack of fodder with new President" - The Onion 3/30/2009
"We've landed on Mars! That's great!" - 9/29/2012
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